Burnout Recovery

Ep#160 Powertool#5 How to Champion Yourself

Dex Randall Season 3 Episode 160

Powertool #5: Learning to Champion Yourself. If you're feeling burned out, overwhelmed, or caught in a cycle of self-criticism, this episode is for you. Learn practical techniques to help you reconnect with your inner strength, offering yourself instead the love and support you deserve.

Championing yourself is a huge step toward healing and recovery from burnout. Let’s dive in and rediscover your true worth.

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[00:00:00] Hi everyone, my name's Dex Randall, and this is the Burnout to Leadership podcast, where I teach professional men to recover from burnout and get back to passion and reward at work.

[00:00:22] Hello my friends. Welcome to this week's episode. This is Dex with you again on Burnout Recovery Power Tool number five on how to champion yourself. And just to recap these 10 Burnout Recovery Power Tools are for executives, leaders, physicians, professionals who are suffering from burnout and want to recover.

[00:00:44] Take hope. You're stronger than you feel right now. Burnout may be tough but you're tougher. If this is your first dip into the Power Tools series, I recommend you do go back and listen to the first four episodes because each tool builds on the last. The first four Power Tools will help you reduce your anxiety and suffering, find better ways to progress how you feel, to turn down your inner critic, and to create freedom from enslavement to negative emotions.

[00:01:15] Once you're practicing these first four power tools every day, you're going to be well equipped to tackle burnout, especially things you might feel are beyond your control at the moment. So then we come to power tool number five today, my personal favorite. I'm going to teach you how to champion yourself in a world that feels, at times, adversarial.

[00:01:40] And you can do this fueled by the love that is currently missing in your life. Because really, your suffering during burnout is too great. It's unbearable, right? You become hypersensitive to criticism, failure, and judgment. Your work rate and consistency are falling a little bit short, which leads to guilt, shame, frustration, and blame.

[00:02:06] And there's a power imbalance you can't fix, leaving you feeling helpless and you're worn out trying. You start avoiding people in self preservation, no doubt. And your imposter syndrome makes you feel inadequate. Yet really, your life is largely a reflection of your beliefs about yourself. About who you are and what you're capable of.

[00:02:31] So it's time to help yourself out. Once you learn this new way of having your own back, you'll never be alone again. In burnout, you've neglected your own needs. You're shocked by how low you've fallen, shame keeps you from looking closely at yourself, and guilt prevents you from caring for your own needs.

[00:02:54] Instead, you cast blame outward. But burnout isn't normal. I don't believe you need to put up with it. The suffering is real, cumulative, exhausting and mood crushing. But not permanent. And you've likely suffered before in your life from relationship struggles, performance letdowns, loss, weakness, illness or rejection.

[00:03:19] You've been found deficient before. Despite being professional, well educated, hard working, gifted and capable, you doubt yourself. Partial unfair feedback, dismissal or bullying crush you. Your perfectionism pushes you into overdrive, trying to prove yourself, and you rarely rest. Yet you still can't pull it all off.

[00:03:46] All the shadows of the past come back, your inner critic grows louder, and you start to wonder if the bad things people say about you are true. Your past failures, bullying, a failed marriage, lost opportunities, feel like burdens you're carrying. You're ashamed, isolated, and don't know who to talk to. At this point, you turn your back on yourself, criticising and judging every tiny mistake, in the hope that pointing out your errors will make you pull yourself together.

[00:04:24] But it doesn't. You feel depressed, anxious, and people begin to avoid you or take tasks away from you. And this isn't just you. I've been through this same sort of thing myself. Why am I sharing this? Because I want you to recover. I believe in you, the real you, beneath the burnout. And to recover, you Really, you need to clearly see your daily experience.

[00:04:53] What's hurting, why it's unbearable, and how you're reacting. And then you need to take that control. Burnout isn't the first result of your suffering. There are antecedents. And as you look back on your life, you might begin to see what set you up for burnout. Who planted the seeds of your self doubt, making you feel like an imposter?

[00:05:17] Who didn't believe in you or implied that this is all you deserve? Those people who made you feel deficient or not enough were actually projecting their own fears onto you. They weren't right, but they did do the best they could with what they knew. Power tool number five, learning to champion yourself, means you no longer have to believe those old messages.

[00:05:44] You're not broken. You're not deficient. You're perfectly formed. Self belief is yours for the taking. It's a powerful agent for change. Instead of despairing, you can take up the banner of your true self. Loving, caring, generous, willing. You can step back into your life as your own protector. And you can start that here, today.

[00:06:11] Don't know how? I'm going to walk you through four exercises to teach you how to champion yourself. Spend just five to ten minutes on each exercise to start rewiring your mindset. You can download the worksheet for these exercises in the Power Tools page. If you're well connected with your inner life, through meditation, yoga or other practices, you might find these exercises easy.

[00:06:39] But even if you've never tried them before I encourage you to experiment. Burnout recovery requires change. If you keep being as mean to yourself as you probably are right now, your road to recovery is going to be a tough one. Champion yourself is really the golden power tool that unlocks the good energy you need to recover.

[00:07:01] So here we are, exercise number one, your guardian angel. Get a piece of paper or type on your device. And answer intuitively these questions. Whatever comes to mind is the right answer. answer. If you have a guardian angel, what would they look like? How are they dressed? Where are they? How do they get around?

[00:07:23] Visualize them or imagine them. Describe them fully and consider their characteristics. Are they perhaps kind, patient? Even affectionate. Are they a good listener? Do they understand you and not judge you? Do they offer sage advice or love from a distance?

[00:07:44] When you've done that, imagine this guardian angel as part of you. If you can't access this image, think of somebody in your life who has believed in you. Perhaps a wise and benevolent figure. Because whatever you can imagine or see, that supportive energy is within you, waiting to help. So that's exercise one, your guardian angel.

[00:08:06] Exercise two, timeless compassion. Think about an aspect of your suffering in burnout. Something that reminds you of earlier moments in life when you were judged, rejected or shamed. See that younger version of yourself suffering and needing love, acceptance and care. Can you now offer compassion for that younger self?

[00:08:33] Can you give them in your mind the support they need? You get to be that guardian angel now, offering care, love and understanding. And in doing so, you'll help heal that part of you that's still carrying pain. So that's Exercise 2, Timeless Compassion. Exercise 3, Acknowledging Worthiness. You must recognise your inner worthiness and sufficiency, accepting yourself fully, flaws and all, and celebrating your life.

[00:09:06] Of course, this requires self belief. You actually don't need to believe everything other people have taught you. About yourself. Start again. Write your own rules for self love and acceptance. So ask yourself this, what will it take for you to agree that you are a good human? No matter the mistakes or challenges, that your core is still pure and you're worthy.

[00:09:33] Recognizing your inherent worthiness is key to healing burnout. And finally, exercise four, champion yourself. This is really the dynamite. Championing yourself means being the protector you always wish that you had, especially when things go wrong. You need to see through the walls of pain and offer understanding, sympathy and soothing.

[00:09:57] Finally, you must write the rules for giving yourself unconditional love. So ask yourself, do I have a good heart? Am I well intentioned? And if the answer is yes, can that be enough to love yourself unconditionally? Or if not, what is enough? What does enough look like? And of course, none of this means excusing poor behaviour, but really it means offering gentle correction.

[00:10:26] Stand up for your wounded self every time, no matter what, as if you're caring for a child. Because sometimes you are dealing with your inner child and punishing an already traumatized child for mistakes, it just isn't going to help. You are capable of giving that child your healing care. It's your new job, right?

[00:10:48] Coming out of burnout to help them feel safe to be who they are. By practicing these four exercises, you'll begin to reconnect with yourself. Heal your wounds and create a sense of internal safety, free from the fear of self rejection. Thus you will champion your way back from burnout. That's what I have for you today.

[00:11:11] If you are in burnout and would like help, come and talk to me for free and let's make a plan for you to recover quickly and sustainably and get back to your best performance, leadership, success and most of all enjoyment inside work and out. You can book an appointment at DexRandall. com. If you'd enjoyed today's show, I'd love you to rate it, leave a review, and share it with your friends, because this is how we can reach out to help more people who suffer in burnout.

[00:11:41] Thank you for listening today. Next week we're going to dive into power tool number six, building confidence, when I'll share powerful ways to rebuild trust in yourself and your abilities. Every power tool, every week, builds more strength. 

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