Burnout to Leadership

Ep#8 How to be the best client

November 12, 2021 Dex Randall Season 1 Episode 8
Burnout to Leadership
Ep#8 How to be the best client
Show Notes Transcript

What you will learn:

  • How to set yourself up for recovery from burnout.
  • Why not everyone does that.
  • The attributes of people who recover.
  • Ten tips on becoming the person who leaves burnout behind.

Hi everyone, my name's Dex Randall, and this is the Burnout to Leadership podcast where I teach professional men to recover from burnout and get back to passion and reward at work. Hello there, this is Dex, how you going today? I'm gonna talk to you this episode about how to get what you came for from burnout coaching or indeed any other method you might use to recover from burnout, including the proven tools and ideas I present in this podcast, which I always hope will be helpful to you, tried and tested as they are, on myself and my clients. If you're a professional, you absolutely can recover from burnout. And on this podcast, particularly this episode, I want you to help set yourself up for success using what I know about the attributes of people who do successfully recover from burnout and sustain that recovery. For example, my clients who I've watched time and time again recover, flourish at work and thrive as people. And to be honest, that's what I want for all of you listening. Because the truth is, not everyone wanting to recover from burnout makes it. Look outside yourself in the wider world at the current pandemic of burnout across the globe, it's wholesale across some professions, medicine, teaching, law, IT, to name a few. Most people in burnout and most organizations trying to support their staff out of burnout, they're actually doing it wrong, in my opinion. It seems to be a rather misunderstood condition and strategies offered for recovery are often costly and not very effective. Burnout itself, of course, is also costly and ineffective. It's very costly in human terms, it's quality of life, health and relationships, but also of course to organizations, communities, families, careers, economies, the health system, and also there's a financial impact. Burnout in fact costs the USA between 125 and 190 billion every year in health care alone, that's 80% total of healthcare. Burned out employees are 23% more likely to end up in the emergency room, and 63% more likely to take a sick day. They cost employers 34% of their annual salary, and still companies don't know how to help their employees to recover, and to be honest, it's not complex. I teach people how to tackle all the major symptoms of burnout by learning how not to develop them in the first place, how to create genuine resilience and learn to thrive in the face of any work conditions. That probably sounds unlikely to you right now if you're in burnout, but stick with me on that. Also, note that not all people wishing or hoping to recover from burnout are willing to take the steps to recover. Some may believe they should fix it themselves. Some don't believe there is a solution. Some don't want to ask for or accept help. Some tell me they've already tried everything. Some are so ashamed, they don't even mention it, and some just think it's going to go away by itself. This episode is for you if you've recognized you can't resolve burnout by yourself, and you're ready to find out what really works. So here's what I do when I meet a guy in burnout, I personally, I vet my potential clients, and I'm going to share with you how and why. Because it might help you work out why you yourself are still stuck in burnout and how you can maximize your own chance of recovery, and there is a lot you can do if you approach it in the right way, and you're gonna learn how to do that here. So I screen applicants in four ways, and number one is how good a fit are they for my program? In fact, are they professionals in burnout, is burnout their primary problem? If you listen to episode one of this podcast, Burnout 101, and you identify with the descriptions of burnout there, that's gonna help you know if you're in or near burnout. Some people do come to me with burnout that's on top of an underlying mental health problem, and if they're already working on that with a therapist, that's fine, I can coach them alongside that and really accelerate progress. If not, it depends where they're at, but sometimes I suggest they might want to explore therapy options if their underlying mental health problem can be supported better that way, and then they can come on to coaching as soon as they are ready. To be clear, most people in burnout are suffering ongoing stress, anxiety, depressive thinking, insomnia, loss of motivation, maybe low level addiction, anger management issues, and a whole bundle more and that's all normal, but I do differentiate that from big A Anxiety and major depression. So number one, are you a good fit for burnout coaching? Are you in burnout, is it your main problem? Number two is, how good a fit people are for the way that I work? Do I think I can help them or not? Will my style of coaching get them where they want to go? Will it facilitate the transformation that they need and give them the maximum value on the way? Will they really gel with my style of work? Because I'm kind of blunt, I'm not a sugar coater, I don't really see how that would help anyone recover, and I'm really super interested in results. "So can I do my best work with this person?" I ask myself. Because I don't take on anyone I don't think will be successful working with me. And for you listening on this podcast, I hope always to be able to offer useful insight and tools to help you work with your burnout symptoms regardless. So number two, are you a good fit with my work? Number three will they actually do the work? Are they good for it? Will they use the tools provided to affect the necessary change? And some people are a bit resistant, complacent or have too much pride to change how they do things, they still wanna fix it their way, which they're welcome to do if it works, anything that works is tremendous. I'm all for it. Some people tell me they are too busy, exhausted or overwhelmed, but of course, everyone who comes to me feels like that. It's not a barrier to success at all, we can work with that. Some people are not motivated, they've had a flame out, and likewise, we can work with that. I can help you develop more motivation, more and more over time. The biggest predictor of success in my program is commitment and discipline. The will to do all the work and use all the tools provided. Another issue can be shame and having to face failure, but I've got an antidote to that one, too. I regard every man in burnout as already worthy, talented and capable, and I teach him to regard himself in the same way. Shame doesn't have to be crippling and it doesn't have to be a barrier to recovery. I'm gonna do a separate podcast episode on shame presently, so look out for that one. But basically, everyone in burnout experiences shame, because guess what? Every human experiences shame, it's a normal human emotion. But what I teach is the way to work with shame, it takes the sting out of it so that it doesn't hold you back from achieving anything. When people do commit to do the work, I guarantee results in my program, and that's how well the tools actually work. So number three, will you do the work and use the tools? Number four, will they accept help? Will they be honest and take responsibility for themselves, their current condition and their recovery? Can they be honest about why they haven't been able to fix their problem so far or what hasn't been fixed? Will they help? Will they accept help on recovering? So that's number four. Will you ask for and accept help? So that's how I vet people coming in, that's how I find out whether people are going to be a good fit for my program or not. So now, let's dive into what a perfect client is, because this is gonna help all of you listening in, if you'd like to recover from burnout, regardless of how you intend to do that. And again, I provide is... I commit to providing as much direction and as many tools as I can in this podcast to support your growth and your emergence from burnout. If you're still unsure if this applies to you, you might want to listen to Episode Two, Who Gets Burnout, and Episode Three, How to Recover. But let's say this is you, you're in burnout, you want to recover, here is the best way, I believe, to set yourself up for success in that. Number one, be willing to ask for and accept help. Two, give the solution your full open minded attention, bring a beginner's mind. Three, decide to 100% commit to using the tools of recovery. Four, consistently make time to practice and apply those tools. Five, identify your goal in coming out to burnout, and why you want it to support you when the going gets tough. Six, do everything that's suggested, like it or not. Seven, accept occasional failures gracefully as just part of the journey. Eight, don't give up until you recover. Nine, don't let pride, desire, emotional discomfort, distractions or time stand in your way. Ten, show up at 100% for yourself. Give recovery a red hot, go. Eleven, let go of blame and take ownership of the solution. Twelve, be prepared to develop a better relationship with yourself, your work and other people. If you doubt yourself, if you doubt that you have what it takes to recover, that is generally not true of most of the people that I meet because you're professional, right? You're made of the right stuff already, you've got the right habits already, you're not broken, you have just gone off track a little bit. And you can have your mojo back. If I can recover and my clients can recover then so can you. Above all, as you listen to this, be gentle with yourself, give yourself a little grace, acknowledge that times have been tough, but now you're in the solution, you're courageous, you're moving forward and you chose well. So that's how to be the best client and give yourself the best chance of bouncing back from burnout, whether you use the tools laid out here or get coaching or however you do it, I really do wish you all the best. And if you try the tools here in this podcast or in these episodes, if you listen to them, and you think you're a good fit for coaching, come and talk to me. Coaching accelerates results. I spend the first four to six weeks of my program getting clients out of the burnout disaster zone, and then I teach them how to maintain and deepen their own resilience and enjoyment over the weeks, months and years ahead. And then finally, I teach them to step into their maximum performance leadership qualities. So if you're interested in talking to me, listen on at the end for the link, but in any case, thank you for listening today, I appreciate you being here. You can visit my website at dexrandall.com for the show notes, and please do subscribe and rate this podcast, thank you. If you're in burnout and ready to recover, come and join my Burnout to Leadership program. You can book in to talk with me at burnout.dexrandall.com Just tell me what's bugging you and let's make a plan to fix it.